Covid19 is shit, let's just clear that out of the way. This has been a crappy, stressful and hard year. Even for those of us who are introverted and found working from home a great way of getting things done, without all the social anxiety of being around lots of people. Pete's passing and my Father in Law's apparently rapid in decline in health pushed our stress levels to breaking point. As with other elderly couples one takes the strain when the other becomes frail. It's just that there's a physical cost to taking the strain. My Father in Law had been covering for my Mother in Law's physical issues, we almost lost him to heart surgery. He's still not right.
However, you can't doom-scroll life and I've learnt to try and limit my doom-scrolling to over breakfast only.
I've re-focused on enjoying the moment, at this time of turning I am lucky to have moved next to a magnificent Oak and Yew where I can see the cycle of the seasons. It's like the myths where the Oak is the guardian of the light half of the year and the Yew the guardian of the dark half of the year. This year has been about introducing myself to them, next year I shall start offering to them at appropriate times I think.
The other joy has always been mountain biking, a new house means finding new rides. I am lucky to live near the Greensand Way, a Roman road that follows the line of the South Downs between the rivers Ouse and Arun. The area of the South Downs Way I consider 'my patch', this road had been lost to me. Except here I can now ride East/West along remnants of it, it has been a joy to create a circuit of the Greensand Way and the South Downs Way where I can find stillness within the storm, moments without stress whilst physically working hard. I can find flow and with that feeling happy.
Here's the Yew from my back door...
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